Hog #2!


The 2nd Hog!

Let’s do this thing!

Once again so much has happened in the last couple of weeks I feel that I needed to write sooner than later to preserve the recent experiences before they started breaking down into their more primal elements…

Tubing: Ruled!

The Green River is gorgeous. I couldn’t stop humming the CCR song of the same name for the first couple of hours before we left (I whole-heartedly apologize to all in my proximity who are easily annoyed, I always roll with a tightly packed ball of TP. I am more than happy to break you off a bit and gently insert in your ear canal [happy emoticon here]) Anyway, tubing was amazing. The gentle currents that began the 3.5-hour journey promised a “lazy river” type experience. This however was not the case. (This is, of course, coming from the POV of a man who doesn’t like “things” to touch him underwater while he is swimming.) We were beaten, bloodied (barely), and bludgeoned as we battled the mighty waves. Only a couple of rope swings required a more formal investigation and proved a prompt and infinitely wholesome and enjoyable respite from the epic and mighty maritime battle the Green River was waging upon us.  (FYI: Beware the next day abdominal cramps that accompany excessive rope swinging…they exist and they will get you if you do not practice restraint.) An all-together wonderful experience…afterwards we were introduced to Taco Dog! I got one of each! What more could you ask for?

Animation Class at Boys and Girls Club in Gaffney: Still going!

Our class was extended and will take a little break for the holidays…

It starts back up this Monday.

Key words: Rube Goldberg Machine, unintentionally psychedelic computer noises emitted from 5th graders, a “person sized box,” and the color RED

New Ping-Pong Table: Done and done and fun as fun!

Here is some footage of myself and Eric Kocher (aka Lil’ Dad) christening the new (to us) athletic object:





Coming to Spartanburg at a local art gallery and music venue near you….

And while I’m on a promotional kick…I might as well kick my socks off too.

Here are the newest home-wrought Kubbspel games from Voyage Corps Gifts and Goatmother Industrial (goatmother.com and goatmother.blogspot.com)

If you like leisure sports, you and I are going to get along just fine.

Pass the pickles…not these pickles…Those Pickles!

Hmmm…what else?

The 4th of July: Did it up GOOD.

I was not able to be in Spartanburg during the 4th’s festivities because a long time friend and band mate’s imminent departure loomed steady and we owed it to ourselves and both of our fans to have a “bye for now” Hurrah before Petey (bass) went west to the land of Ports (and micobrews and really good coffee, and bigger better bike lanes)

The musical outfit goes by the name The Coke Dares. (www.thecokedares.com)

(Here we are in front of a giant sculpture of independence located along the side of the highway outside Bloomington, IN. Yes, that is a monster truck. Yes that is a statue of liberty made of garbage bags. And yes, that is a sasquwatch that seems to be shaped like a football player.)

Besides creating album covers that would banish all hope of a future in politics, we are known for providing the audience with commercial-length songs with a bluesy and classic rocksy type width. To continue on the mathematical metaphor is pointless, but I am a Completest (sp?)…The height could refer to the speed of the songs. To be honest, the pace has slackened, since we have not been able to practice in over a year and we were not able to practice before the show (wink wink) No one really seems to notice.

So here is a video of our show in the continually wonderful town of Bloomington, IN. We offer you a censored cover of “Born in the USA” with all the anti-American lyrics removed…this song is, in turn played with one hand, the other hand either pumping in the air, or grasping tightly the claw of your neighborly and patriotic brethren.

Both Jason the Pete, the two other gents in the band, have acquired a fascination with 50 CC engines strapped to bike frames from the 70s and 80s. These infernal machines are then super charged to lessen the impedance on the Hoosier traffic and, as was the case with the moped I was driving, to announce your presents to all mammals within a 5-block radius.

BEWARE!…….mopeds are fun but highly addictive.

Here is a video of our “gang” before we retrieved the proper legal explosives for the night’s festivities.

The Chesnee Flea Market: Did it!

Though groggy and confused, Eric, Camille, and myself meandered into the flea market at around 8am. I’m still a bit confused about the marketing decision to have the market only open from 6am to 10am, but they seem to have no problem with attendance, so I will now politely eat my words.

Tube socks, tools, ladies jeans, chickens, magazines, little bits of metal, tube socks, speakers, knives, daggers, machetes, stun guns, tube socks, laundry detergent, cell phones, collectibles, kittens, plumb produce, video games, tube socks, and much much more.

There was one point where I was “zoned out” wandering through the row and rows of blankets and tables weighed down with former lively hoods or unwanted “valuables.”

“Hey you.”

I looked up to see a man and women in their mid-fifties with feet dangling off the bed of a pick up truck. Both were all smiles. They seemed immune to the bustle around them. The rusty pickup was their white sand beach and the surrounding wave of attempted frugal achievement was their crystal blue ocean.

“Um, yea.”

“I got something for ya.”

Gesturing behind him into the bed of the truck was an Ab Roller.

“This is for you. You wanna 6 pack?… 12 pack?…..whatever… this will give you what you want.”

Well, I didn’t end up with the Ab Roller specifically, but I was very SOLD on the Chesnee Flea Market.

Here are some choice pics from the experience…shot from the hip.

Saturday Night Pro-Wrestling: Really did it.

Ummmm, I think I will save this one for next time.

You’re always supposed to leave them wanting more, right?

(unless, of course, you have stopped reading by now…buh.)

Until the next Hog needs chased down….good bye.

PS Little Jimmy got his first legs! Raise your glass to Jim-Jim!


1 Comment

Filed under Artists-in-Residence, Mark Rice (11-12)

One response to “Hog #2!

  1. So THAT’s Little Jimmy!

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